Bloggers, if you're not careful, can be home-field wreckers. At Oklahoma, news of Bomar's pay-for-play car dealership job first appeared on a Texas A&M post.HT: The Wiz
Florida Coach Urban Meyer is so fed up with the Internet — "it just horrifies me," he complained at Southeastern Conference media day — he banned it from his house.
Maybe the tipping point was Meyer's wife, Shelley, finishing third in a blog of "Top Wives of the SEC."
- CHRIS DUFRESNE / ON COLLEGE FOOTBALL / Link
Thursday, August 31
The Thundering Herd Takes Home The EDSBS Heisman of Off Season Thuggery
Behold, the final leaderboard for Orson and Stranko's Fulmer Cup:
Tennessee makes the namesake proud by defending it's SEC Championship. Hot on the Vols heels was perennial thuggery powerhouse Mississippi State.
If only The Dogs from the West still gave us "Tha Dog Pound Rock" on a regular basis. Such a great tradition. Truly an artform. It would have put them over the top in this blogger's humble opinion.
Posted by Erik at 7:17 AM
Vince Vaughn Is Cool
Is it a sign? Is Ole Miss about to go "Old School" on the SEC? A la 1960, Undefeated National Champs? Or, is Vince just a big fan of the best collection of beautiful women this side of America's Next Top Model. Either way, it makes me smile.
Rumor has it that Vaughn could have received this tee from ex-girlfriend and current Oxford resident, Joey Lauren-Adams. Or, Ole Miss could have given it to him for his recent, second half "Hotty Toddy" intro.
Either way, he looks strangely like an aging/disheveled Ole Miss student after a hard fought football Saturday.
Who am I kidding? An Ole Miss man would never leave the house without at least some sort of collared attire.
None the less, it's great to see a Celeb that has his head on straight.
Other than Will Ferrell, is there any cooler guy to share a beer with?
Hotty Toddy, indeed.
By the way, who would you rather have supporting your team? Vince Vaughn...or this turd muffin...
He's really excited about the Buckeyes upcoming season!
Posted by Erik at 5:57 AM
Wednesday, August 30
It's Like a Five Day Holiday...And I'm Not Even Jewish!
courtesy of those yankees over at ESPN
Posted by Erik at 8:54 PM
Tuesday, August 29
One Man's White-Trash is Another Man's Treasure
The South is known for many great stereotypes: Friendly folks, beautiful women, and also great down home eats.
And luckily for me, most of those stereotypes are spot on, but depending on your viewpoint, The South can also leave a somewhat ugly taste in your mouth.
Like it or not, The Redneck is our unofficial mascot.
When some ignorant geek in California or New York thinks about our home, The South, what so often comes to mind? Or, when a Pac-10 Girly Man watches a CBS game, what preconceived notions are being reinforced and by whom?
In the vein of "One Man's Trash is Another Man's Treasure" we need to get to the bottom of this.
Rednecks run rampant and unsupervised in The Deep South. While they serve their purpose (keeping Hardees and Aaron's Rent to Own financially viable), rednecks can also be a drain on our floundering economy.
The evidence shows that Rednecks are responsible for any number of crimes against civilization:
-Pickup-trucks up on blocks ("that there got good bones")
-Miller High Life (Sh#t,Yeah!)
-Wife Beaters in Public (gotta pimp tha new "These Colors Don't Run" tatoo)
-Trucker Hats (wondering why everyone else wears them now)
-Midriff exposing attire with prerequisite gut and/or "front butt" for the ladies
-Football Jerseys that say things like "Roll Tide"
-Sports jerseys in general
-Black Tee Shirts
-Tee Shirts with things like "Princess" or "Drama Queen"
These people, who so prominently represent us (Southerners) in film, on
Springer and in national news casts ("Now Bubba, tell us about the train
wreck..."), must be recognized for what they truly are. In no way representative of me/you (you are in fact reading this blog and doing so at a gainful job).
Furthermore, their drunken, unprotected and disease-ridden sexual
transgressions are the ground zero for many of the social ills that plague our
nation. If you were conceived in "The Infield" of Talladega Super Speedway, you might be a Deep South Redneck. Especially if you brag about that fact (unfortunately, those that were, probably haven't heard about this thing called "da enter net")
As you can see, this subject matter fascinates me. That's why I'm working furiously to obtain a few research grants to open the first Southern Institute of Redneck Studies. But which University would be the perfect environment to house such a groundbreaking center like S.I.R.S.?
What SEC school would give me the best petri dish from which to observe the worst and the brightest of the True Southern Redneck (Dixious Rouge-neckus) in its natural habitat?
This question will not be answered in one simple posting. Oh no! This is a complex issue with multiple facets and what not.
Soon we will ranking the SEC schools and their fans in order of their redneckery, and that, my dear friend, is something you cannot afford to miss!
Posted by Erik at 11:04 AM
Friday, August 25
Thursday, August 24
DeepSouthSports Joins in on The Vote
Yes, it's finally here. My first stab at the nearly world famous college football poll brought to us by mgoblog.
I'm still a proponent of "watch and wait", but on the other hand, who doesn't like to speculate about College Football? If you don't, then maybe you should go check out some mindless celebrity gossip, you freak.
Why Blogpoll? Cause the coaches don't watch the damn games, I watch the damn games!
Here's the National Week 1 Preseason BlogPoll
And now, a preview of my week 2 poll (read: miseducated guess):
1- Ohio State
4- Southern Cal
5- Notre Dame
8- Louisiana State
9- Florida State
10- Miami (Florida)
11- West Virginia
13- Virginia Tech
17- Penn State
21- Texas Tech
25- Arizona State
Posted by Erik at 10:18 PM
Lend Me Your Eyes
We seem to be having some technical difficulties with the old template. It appears to favor Firefox, while it takes offense to IE (We at DSS try not to use "The Man's" product whenever possible). If anybody notices anything that ain't kosher about the site (other than the lack of intriguing content, you smartass), please, shoot me an email and/or comment.
Edit: I just said, "screw it" and started fresh with a new template. Still, let me know If any of yall have issues with it.
Posted by Erik at 12:25 PM
Wednesday, August 23
Hoover High School Football Practices Self Love in Two-a-Days
Two-a-Days is a look inside the biggest of the big-time in Alabama high school football. Hoover thinks that their team is God's gift to the AHSAA, and they might be right.
Here's the preseason poll for the 2006 season...
Rank School 2005 Pts. No. 1 Hoover (27)*** (14-1) 333 No. 2 Daphne (13-2) 216 No. 3 Prattville (1) (11-1) 190 No. 4 Davidson (12-1) 163 No. 5 Tuscaloosa County (12-1) 143 No. 6 Homewood** (15-0) 129 No. 7 Opelika (12-2) 125 No. 8 Foley (8-2) 69 No. 9 Murphy (10-2) 50 No. 10 Oak Mountain (10-4) 42 ***-2005 Class 6A state champs. **-2005 Class 5A state champs.
MTV has decided to take these already overly cocky high school kids and make them into reality tv pseudo-celebs. I can't wait to hear the jackassery that spews from their young, impressionable pieholes.
And, don't forget the parents and coaches!
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, and that is certainly true in this suburb.
Remember that cute little scene in Varsity Blues (An MTV Movie) when all the dads are leaning on the fence watching practice and saying stuff like...
"That boy ain't half the G.D. Quarterback I was." and "Sh#t, dem boys haven' da time of they lives!"
Be prepared for a lot of that kind of craptacular commentary.
Don't worry though, MTV and their team of reality show writers (an oxymoron) are the real stars of the show. They get paid to make this show fit the stereotype that they find most interesting.
Yes, It should be quite a spectacle. A detached from reality, redneck and over the top view of southern high school football. MTV, not to mention 50% of the country, thinks red states like Alabama are backwards and ignant, and they'll do their damndest to package that up for you.
Being that I've done time in the urban sprawl known as Hoover and still live a safe distance away, I think I will thoroughly enjoy this latest MTV offering.
Hey, it couldn't be any worse than Pillow Biter NEXT, Room Raiders and Date My Mom. At least these kids will pretend to have family values.
Season Premiere - Wed, Aug. 23 @ 9:30 Central - MTV
Two-a-Days @ MTV
Aiming For Perfection @ Sports Illustrated
Hoover Alabama @ Wikipedia
The Preseason High School Top 25 @ S.I.
Posted by Erik at 1:21 PM
Friday, August 18
Thursday, August 17
Lawyer: Clarett has ties to alleged Israeli mobster
This Clarett case is just getting too bizarre to ignore. In my wildest dreams I couldn't have come up with an awesome scenario like this.
Michael Jackson, John Daily and O.J. Simpson have all weighed in on the situation and are saying that Maurice is one F'ed up dude. The writers of 24 and The Sorpranos are furiously taking notes on these latest developments.
ESPN Reports that the former Ohio State running back had an interesting working arrangement with an Israeli mobster/Sugar Daddy. Allegedly this Hebrew Al Capone supported Clarett during his "down time" until he would start getting paid by an NFL team (House In Malibu, BMW, etc...). In exchange, Clarett would pay 60% of his NFL contract to said mobster jackass.
Unfortunately for Maurice and his evil backers, Maurice sucks at football. M.C. was one of the Denver Broncos first cuts of the 2005 preseason, and now he's out of the game forever.
I doubt this is what the Israeli gangsters had in mind. Yeah, I bet they're pretty pissed off...
Who do you blame here?
Obviously Maurice didn't get the memo. Everybody in the NFL knows to steer clear of those shady Middle Eastern Gangsters types. Duh! They're usually bigger soccer fans, anyway.
But what about the Israelis? What the hell were they smoking? Investing in Maurice Clarett is about as masochistic as employing M.C. Hammer as your financial advisor.
Posted by Erik at 11:32 PM
Sports Illustrated has named it one of the nation's top 12 radio shows of its kind. The Nashville Tennessean has labeled Finebaum the fourth most-influential powerbroker in Southeastern Conference sports.So what the hell is he doing calling me (Erik from Homewood)?
I guess he had some time to kill between mental giants like Phyllis from Mulga and Shane from Centerpoint. It is a five hour show.
Here's the file on Mr. Paul Finebaum - Bio - Website - Wikipedia - EDSBS Interview
And Now... Paul and Erik tackle...
The Top 5 Wives of the SEC - The Interview (windows media) - The Source Article
This is a preemptive "So Sorry" to Kim and Dennis Franchione
Posted by Erik at 10:38 AM
Wednesday, August 16
On the strength of this promotional video, I say we drop those Vanderbilt nerds and pick up a real university. Clemson is Hot, Hot, Hot!
Plus, then The SEC would have two Death Valleys and three Tigers. It doesn't get much sweeter than that.
Posted by Erik at 1:50 PM
It seems The DeepSouthSports' Most Hated Coach in the SEC, Phil Fulmer may end up getting munsoned sooner, rather than later.
CollegeFootballTalk.com seems to believe that we can put a fork in Phil, he's done.
Phil's 6 Division Titles, 2 SEC Championships and 1 BCS Championship should keep his corpulent noggin off the chopping block for a few seasons...Right?
Fat chance, Phil.
No, the fans and media have increasingly short memories, and it seems you're only as good as last season's record (5-6).
When you're down and out, you really find out who you're friends are, and I think it goes without saying that NCAA Chairman Myles Brand will not be receiving his holiday Tennessee Pride Sausage platter from this jolly ole football coach.
Screw it...More for Phil and the girls.
NCAA, you do not want to piss off the sausage boy!
HT: Thanks, Rob
Posted by Erik at 10:10 AM
Tuesday, August 15
Golden Tornado Weighs In with "The Only Analysis That Matters"
Nathan, over at Golden Tornado, has come off sabbatical with a vengeance to give us his long awaited SEC Mascot Analysis: Part One and EDIT: Part Two.
So far, so good, as the SEC has scored relatively high on Nathan's patented "Suck Factor Scale."
How do the other conferences rate?
The PAC 10
The Big 10
The Big 12
The Big East
What we now know about The SEC:
- A new found respect for Pork
- The Auburn War Eagles (As Dubbya put it) would be a lot cooler
- We've got way to many Bulldogs and Tigers
From left: "Whoops, I Dropped the Soap Reb" and "Gay Pride, Personal Trainer Reb"
I think we know now know why these options were resoundingly rejected.
Hell, I guess they're better than LSU's new, more original mascot. You be the judge...
Polly Prissy Pants says "Geaux Bengal Tigerssss!"
Posted by Erik at 9:59 AM
Sunday, August 13
Isn't MS Paint grand? (click to get the full effect)
DeepSouthSports is getting a little bit of a makeover.
It has come to our attention that the web address was a tad bit difficult to remember (especially for the elderly, and the retarded).
Yes, some folks are not hip to the "Blogspot" scene, so we broke the bank and purchased (drum roll, please)...
Wow...I know. It's clean, concise and pops off the tongue!
Why "dot net"?
Cause we don't want any part of the whole "dot com" fallout. Plus some a-hole already snagged the "dot com" version for
illegal sports gambling purposes.
Now I don't have to tell people,
"Dammit, just go to google and search it."
It's the path of least resistance, and that's what we're all about here at DeepSouthSports.net.
Posted by Erik at 2:43 PM
I really want to thank all of those who made this the best week ever for DeepSouthSports (A huge understatement).
I'll certainly work to live up to the hype this Football Season, and it should be one hell of a ride.
Thanks again to all the great readers/commenters, as well as the incredible sites/blogs that have hooked me up:
If you enjoy quality sports commentary and beautifully styled 80s power ballads, definitely check these guys out.
And, if you're wondering what the hell I'm making such a stink about, gander at this graphical representation of my visits this past week...
The Green represents my hits, while the purple represents Phillip Fulmer's career
Back to life...Back to mediocrity! Now, I'd appreciate it if you all would start referring to me as Rob Van Winkle.
"This Blog Rocks, yo! Go Gators!"
At least I know the formula:
Beautiful Women + SEC Football + Steve Perry = HITS!
To say Thanks, I'll give you a clip from one of the greatest movies of my generation. I couldn't find the Danke Shen clip so you'll have to settle for Twist and Shout. And, don't try and read those subtitles...They'll only confuse you.
Posted by Erik at 12:07 PM