Ahhh Marriage...

Eli Manning and new wife Abby seen here on the pink carpet attending the New York premiere of that annoying, bloated, self-important "Sex and the City" movie. Best case scenario, this is Abby's payback for Eli making her sit "general admission" at the Green Bay NFC Championship game...Worst case scenario, Elisha's so a "Samantha" on his facebook page. Why couldn't the Mannings attend a cool premiere like Ironman or Indiana Jones The Dark Knight? Thank jebus Eli won the Superbowl or he'd be getting even more hell-fire for this.

[monstersandcritics]
[A review of said movie from a hetero guy's perspective]

Best State of Alabama Youtubery Ever

This is a heads up battle for the best Youtube video produced in the state of Alabama. It makes me so happy, that to millions of viewers around the world, this is what they think of, other than Forrest Gump, when they think Alabama...

Montgomery -

I think he just served you your ass on a dinette set. OH YEAH!

VS

Mobile -

Could be a crack head! Or it could be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

I'd like to see your state do better than that. A combined 9 million views. Can we get a national championship banner up in this bitch? Make sure to rock the vote. Make your voice heard in the poll over to your right...

Fluff Piece Season

"8th Time's the Charm"

This is when we rank everything and tell you our self-important, extremely flawed and obviously biased opinions on stuff.

Here, some Rivals writer gives us this meaningless, devoid of reason fluff on Alabama's upcoming season. Of all the SEC programs, this is why Alabama is the team on the rise...

LUCK IS TURNING: The numbers might be on Nick Saban's side. All of Alabama's losses – six of them – came by a touchdown or less. And there were signs of hope in the bowl game: After losing the last four games of the regular season by an average of 6.5 points, the Crimson Tide beat Colorado 30-24 in the Independence Bowl.

Why does everyone seem to think Bama's gonna be better this season? Seriously? Give me something more than "Well, it's Saban's second year" or the aforementioned BS about "all of Alabama's losses came by a touchdown or less." What the writer fails to mention was that four of Alabama's seven wins came by a touchdown or less...they lost their best playmakers on defense, the wide receiver core is green as hell, and SJPW is on his third offensive coordinator in as many years...And he didn't exactly look like a world beater in 2007. Not to mention the fact that Nick Saban has proven to be a mediocre on-the-field coach/motivator.

You're gonna hear a lot of opinions this summer, but in this experts eyes, all this adds up to a Shreveport hat-trick for the Crimson Tide.

LSU Fan of the Week

Damn, I miss college football. On fall Saturdays, this is how I feel,on the inside...but maybe a little less gay:



Seeing that, it's hard to imagine LSU fans would ever intentionally urinate on anyone.

[loserswithsocks]

Get Your Ass To Hoover

Once a year, Hoover is the place to be. So, make your way through the endless, hurriedly erected strip malls on to the Hoover Met.

On top of LSU's ridiculous 18 game winning streak, Ole Miss has stepped up its play to join the Bengals in the winner's bracket with this Michael Guerrero walk off that woke the suburbs (circa 12:30am)...



[HT: SSMUND @ nafoom.com]

Hey, For once, Bama's decided to stick around, so we might even have a sell out or two this weekend. Just do it, fool...I know I will.

[2008 SEC Baseball Tournament Central]

Deep South's Guide to What's Good For You in Birmingham

SEC Baseball Tournament Edition (read: Hoover-centric)

This fall, I'll have been living in the greater Birmingham area for a decade, and if there's one thing I've learned during my stay, it's that I love to eat and drink well.



Best Place to Stay for Guys - Ross Bridge Resort

4000 Grand Ave
Hoover, Alabama 35226 USA
(205) 916-7677

It's bad ass. Looks like a European castle, but with an awesome pool and championship golf. Bonus: It's romantic enough that you might even get a little extra special wife/girlfriend action.



Best Place to Stay for the Ladies - The Wynfrey

1000 Riverchase Galleria
Hoover, Alabama 35244
(205) 987-1600

Your woman's not that into baseball? She should be ok in this Bama classy hotel attached to one of the largest malls in the southeast. This is also where SEC Football Media Days is held every year, so it's obviously not too demasculinating.


Best place for lunch - Cajun Steamer

180 Main Street
Ste. 200
Hoover, AL 35244
Phone: (205) 985 - 7785

If you like fried goodness, this is the place. It's laid back, quick and good. In central Alabama, it's the closest thing you can get to "Mother's" in NOLA.


Best Mexican - Iguana Grill (review)

2085 Colonial Drive, Suite 101
(In the Plaza Fiesta off Lorna Rd. in Hoover)
(205) 987-8240

Well worth it and relatively close to the stadium. Women love the atmosphere, food it great for an underwhelming price. They even give you two different types of salsa.


Best Pizza - Tortugas (review)

2801 John Hawkins Pkwy
Hoover, AL 35244
(205) 403-9800

If you like Chicago style (real deep dish) pizza, this place is a must. A lot of native Chicagans (??) say it's as good or better than anything you can get in Ditka-ville. It's outstanding, but it can take awhile to cook. My advice: call ahead.


Best place to watch Sports - Buffalo Wild Wings

2772 John Hawkins Parkway
Suite 100
Hoover, AL 35244

I don't think I'm gonna tell you anything new about this place. Good food (even corndog nuggets for the Bengal Tiger in you) and big screens. Sadly, I have to endorse BWW over the local Bob "Bammer" Baumhower's Wings. I'm usually not gonna steer anybody to the national chain over the local business, but Buffalo Wild Wings does it better in every aspect of the Sports Bar game and if not for the Bama fan contingent ("Gotta support Bear's Boys"), Wings would be gone baby, gone.


Best Steak - Fleming's

103 Summit Boulevard,
Birmingham AL 35243
205-262-WINE (9463)

If you don't mind dropping some serious coin, this is the place for you. Ruth's Chris can't hold Fleming's loin strap. Best Steak I've Ever Had. No shit. And there is nothing in the culinary world I love more than a great cut of beef. Get the bone-in Ribeye ($42, a la carte). Very nice wine list as well.


Best All Around Fine Dining - Highlands Bar and Grill (reviews)

2011 11th Avenue South
Birmingham, AL 35205
(205) 939-1400

This is the top of the food chain in Birmingham. It's on the Southside, so it requires a little more effort, but it's so very worth it. See why Gourmet Mag ranked Frank Stitt's flagship Top 5 in the nation. The menu is seasonal, but it's all outstanding. Southern/French with a upscale bar scene full of Cougars waiting to pounce.


Best Place to Drink Beer and Listen to Live Music in a "Garden" - The J. Clyde

1312 Cobb Lane
Birmingham, Alabama 35205
(205) 939-1312

The Perfect pub for those who've graduated from the typical college bar (see: Innisfree) Technically The J. Clyde is a "beer garden" because of it's awesome, lush back patio and it's bonerific two hundred some-odd available beers. I wrote more about it here.


Best Sushi - Jensei (review)

1820 29th Ave. South (SoHo)
Homewood, AL 35209
(205) 802-1440

If the Crunchy Shrimp Roll is the extent of your Sushi experience, well you might want to skip this place, asshole. Jensei is the best, most serious Sushi establishment in Alabama. Even so, when you step in the little restaurant, you'll feel like you're in swank Manhattan. Sit at the Sushi bar (if you can find a seat anywhere) and watch these culinary ninjas kick some raw ass. You're guarenteed a happy ending at Jinsei.


Best (and only) Dueling Piano Bar - Twist and Shout

2011 Highland Ave. S.
Birmingham, AL 35205
(205)933-2033

As you can tell, the nightlife is on the Southside of Birmingham. If you're looking for a little more entertainment than The J. Clyde can offer, walk on over to the ill-named T&S in the Five Points area (next to perennial late, late night hook up spot, Bellbottoms) T&S is a good "main event" bar for a big night out. Sandwich it between pre-gaming at a relaxed place like The J. Clyde and a late night, booze fueled "last stop on the skank-train," the aforementioned Bellbottoms.


This is meant to be an ever-expanding guide to what's good for you in Birmingham. Check back for updates as I continue to explore the surprising wealth of cool shit to do/eat in Bham.

So Who Wins?

I love how the dude on the right has both his arms fully extended while he's on the mat. Like he won or something?! He looks like my dog when she's sleeping. Talk about a few badasses. Legends of Fighting, my taint.

Mindless Morning Youtubery

Tebow vs. Berry

Eric Berry might have won this battle, but I'd like to see Eric circumcise young native boys. (Plus, Tebow did win the game quite handily) Oh yeah, and Tebow earns a "99" on NCAA Football (to Berry's "94").



[rockytoptalk]

The Kige Party

Finally...Cooking with Kige. Iron Chef Ramsey takes on a fascinating secret ingredient...Pepperoni! (who knew?) Well, lets just say Kige attacks this cooking segment with the same passion and in-depth analysis as he does Youtube Sports. Welcome to the intricate world of Pizza Rolls...



Next week, I hope Kige kicks it up another notch and explains hot dogs.

Perrilloux to be the Butt of Many Cock Jokes

Yeah, that's right. Ryan Perrilloux, the former best quarterback ever, is transferring to the "Championship Division" Jacksonville State Gamecocks, of dubious Jacksonville, Alabama (Northeast Alabama's premier four year university).

[FriendsoftheProgram via al.com]

Good choice. (smoothest. transition. ever.) Ryan picked a university, that before this publicity stunt, was best known, at least in my mind, as having the strongest bisexual color guard in northeast Alabama (and probably the nation). When I say, bisexual, I don't mean it in the hip, MTV, punch in the ovaries, Tela Tequila kind of way. I mean, on top of the normal girls, The Marching Southerners also have hairy faced, largely rotund dudes in sequined, spandex unitards, spinning fake guns and colorful flags and what not. That must be one hell of a scholarship...













Not that there's anything wrong with that...at a football game...right?