Thursday, January 4

THIS JUST IN...

In Bama's Finest Hour, One Classy Fan Shines Through



The best part about this whole fiasco is getting to see Bama Fans exhibiting the class and tradition that they are so well known for. Yes, The Proletariat extended their new gun-for-hire a very special welcome.

That brings me to the kissing, hugging, boozing, triple threat that is Alana Colette Connell.

How did I come upon her name you might ask?

From Alana's Tuscaloosa County Jail File for yesterday's DUI arrest, of course.

As the haters would have you believe, Alana was arrested driving away from Tuscaloosa International. Drunk with joy (and George Dickel) on a Wednesday afternoon.

Hard to imagine, I know.

Tuscaloosa County Jail Search

CONNELL, ALANA COLETTE

Driving under the influence {32-5A-191} {Class: VI}

Proven Winner: Alana Colette Connell


UPDATE: Jan 5 - DeepSouthSports has stumbled upon some Incriminating Video Evidence

15 comments:

  1. And she smiles for the camera... nice! Probably the last time she has a smile and no black eyes before her live in boyfriend prison bitch-slaps her around the trailer for "runnin' the 'surance rates up again" on the Camaro.

    Excellent work Erik! She should be the barometer (a non-coaching wife "control") for all your future SEC wives previews.

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  3. I just put this up on my site. Beautiful stuff
    http://loserwithsocks.wordpress.com/2007/01/04/how-mal-moore-got-his-man-the-untold-story/

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  4. So were they tailgating out there or what?

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  5. She just got to plant one on the next savior* of Alabama football! Of course she's smiling!

    * Offer good only for the next eight years or until some other prestigious college or NFL team comes along. Offer not valid in FL, GA, LA, TX, CA, AK or HI. Performance is not guaranteed and may vary according to prevailing circumstances. Consult your physician.

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  6. Excellent work, although your mention of George Dickel brought back some really unpleasant memories.

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  7. That's a typical Bama fan for you. Like so many Bama fans, she has probably never darkened the door of ANY community college let alone an accredited university.

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  8. ouch people... granted this woman was being stupid...but I don't think that she is any different from any other SEC football fan... drunk on crown royal, dressed in their team's colors and ready to treat the new coach to a steak dinner....

    stop acting like alabama is some hickville and excusing every other school! jerks! and yes I have darkened the doorway of a community college..but only to use the bathroom....

    i am actually getting my master's right now... what are you getting? your special tech degree from DeVry?

    Zing! You just got snapped! lol

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  9. Ouch! I think I just got served.

    I'm speechless.

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  10. Yo Brittni,

    Clearly your parents don't have a master's or else they might have come closer to spelling your name correctly. Typical. You are correct in your assertion that Colette Connell is no different than any other SEC fan. After all, I'm sure plenty of people down your way spend their Thursday afternoons getting $h!tfaced in the parking lot of the local municipal aiport. I guess it's either that or work on your master's degree.

    Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

    Sincerely,
    Dean Wormer

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  11. Just so you know, I have never darkened the doorsteps of a college at all. However, I would be willing to bet that my income is at least triple yours, JC. I graduated from high school with no further education. So, for all you people that think high school is the only way. You are wrong. Roll Tide!!!!

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  12. David,

    There will be no income related nut-flexing on my site. You come off looking like a huge D-bag. Remember that.

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  13. Erik,

    No you don't. Looks like he made his point.

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  14. Is this The Polytechnic Institute's version of Alana Colette Connell?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfuMH3Lp-1U

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