[tuscaloosa county sherrif's office, arrest database]
[ESPN - Bama linebacker Johns charged with selling cocaine, possessing Ecstasy]
Saban sits in his home-office tapping his finger-tips together, Mr. Burns style, as he unleashes a maniacal, Napoleonic laugh.
"THOSE IMBECILES! I told those newspaper imbeciles that these scholarships were taken care of, DIDN'T I! Ha Ha Ha! What's the loss of a few bricks from my personal stash? There's more yayo where that came from. Don't worry your pretty little head, Ter-Bear. And to think, he was so easily and seamlessly framed. What can I say? I'm THE KING OF THIS STATE!!! I'm the f&%king 4 Million Dollar Man! I'm Nick Saban, Bitch. Ha ha!
WHOOPS! So Sorry, Jimmy. Sorry you had to go down like that, but selfish, thuggish backups such as yourself are a-dime-a-dozen and clearly...so easily disposed of.
TERRY...WHERE'S MY F*&KING GREY SPORT COAT!?! F%$k! I've gotta go do some "damage control"...you know trot out my classic "Relative to Character and The Process" speech and blame it on Shula. HA HA HA HAAAAAA! I F*$KING LOVE MYSELF!"
UPDATE: "And poof. Just like that, he's gone." via ESPN...
It didn't take Alabama coach Nick Saban long to react; he dismissed Johns immediately.
"This type of behavior obviously will not be tolerated, and he is no longer a part of our program," Saban said in a statement.
Johns is the 10th Alabama football player arrested within the last year. (Not including "The Snake" RTR!!!!!1)