La Effing Monroe?

When Nick Gets Nervous, He Just Sticks His Hands Under His Arms Like This...




Nick Saban Apologist: "Well, Coach lost to UAB his first year at LSU and then went on to kick some ass!"

Truth: You can't compare the two losses. UAB was a 7-4 team in a much better conference than the Sun Belt. Fact is, the lowest paid coach in Division I just beat the highest paid coach. Irony is such a bitch!

NSA: "Shoot, Mike Shula couldn't of done no better."

Truth: Mike Shula DID do better. With his own "talentless" players (largely the same players Saban's working with) Shula beat the mighty Louisiana Monroe War Hawks 41-7. The way you should be a Sunbelt team.

NSA: "John Parker Wilson just ain't a SEC quarterback."

Truth: "In 2006, Wilson started all 12 games for the Crimson Tide. He finished the season with a passing efficiency of 128.92, completing 216-of-379 (57%) passes for 2,707 yards, 17 touchdowns and ten interceptions. He threw for over 200 yards in the first seven games of the season, setting a new school record, and finished with a school record nine 200-yard games."

Funny, nobody was questioning JPW last year, in his first season as a starter. I wonder what the only difference is? Oh yeah, it's coaching.

NSA: "Shula couldn't recruit worth a damn and that's why we're in this hole."

Truth: Shula recruited pretty well actually. Certainly well enough to win football games in the SEC. From 2004-2006 (players who are currently playing) Shula averaged in the Top 15 classes Nationally according to the gurus over at Rivals. Louisiana Monroe ended up just slightly lower, averaging a Bottom 15 class during that time span (or 104th best nationally).

NSA: "Coach Saban's just gotta change Shula's culture of losing. Believe in the process. Think like a Champ-yun!"

Truth: How long does it take to get your players in shape and grow some coaching balls? Shula was 10 points shy of a 9 win season in 2006. Granted, he didn't finish games in the 4th quarter, but that has to be attributed to his lack of balls or possibly the team's conditioning. Saban's shortcomings certainly can't be attributed to a lack of talent or a lack of balls. Saban's certainly willing to take the risks, but he's still not getting results. Maybe he's just not as good as Shula was gettin the team ready each week.

A few more great excuses


Victorious ULM Head Coach Charlie Weatherbie earns $120,000 a year, while loser Nick Saban "earns" $333,000 per game (or $11,000 a day...game or no game)


When are the fans of Bama gonna quit touching themselves to thoughts of Saban led Champyunships long enough to admit that Nick and staff are getting less out of Shula's players than Shula did. Could Saban be nothing more than a pompous, extremely well paid, top-notch recruiter with mediocre game planning, teaching and administrative skills? (Paging Ed Orgeron) At least he's got some kick ass Just for Men hair.

I said in the preseason that Nick Saban would never be more popular in this state than he was at that moment...leading up to his first game. Truth is, he's not omnipotent, he's not Bear Bryant, and Bama's Not Back. Saban might yet become the savior of the common Alabama man's self worth, but it's gonna be later rather than sooner.

Imagine what Saban could do if he wasn't such a dickface...If he could attract talented/experienced position coaches and coordinators?!? Imagine if Saban wasn't a huge fatty gunt...then maybe the media might cut him a little slack for Alabama's first Sun-Belt loss ever. Imagine is Saban was not the highest paid coach in college football who was staring 4 straight losses and ".500" in the face. No, Rome wasn't built in a day...But The University of Rome didn't get its ass kicked by the Peloponnesian College for the Deaf and Blind either.