Thursday, November 29

Tip Drill, Anyone?

Yeah, that's right. "Tip Drill" is my new cheese-dick name for "links and such" on the blog. No...It's not some awesome late night "movie" that comes on Cinimax right after Hotel Erotica (Daniel)...Quite the contrary. It's all about outstanding college football related foofery.

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- Brian alerted me to the latest developments in wrongfully accused Briarwood CHRISTIAN School graduate Simion Castille's perfectly bogus thuggery/disorderly conduct case (/sarcasm). Yeah, a judge found him to be guilty as hell. (tear)

What's awesome about this case is that this college kid has a team of lawyas representing him for an offense that involves a $150 fine??? Attorneys who I'm sure do not hate themselves and what they've become since they left Alabama Law school, and are totally not touching themselves at night at the thought of representing an All-SEC Crimson Tide football player while at the same time placing themselves that much closer to career .500 Alabama Coach Nick M. Effin' Saban.

They do it Pro-Bono I'm sure. That doesn't bother me at all. What does bother me is that after the testamony of three police officers and a guilty verdict from a judge, they are now appealing the case of the $150 fine and are attempting to take it to full-fledged court:

"If we're going to put Simeon Castille on the stand," defense attorney Roy McCord said, "he wants a jury of his peers and he wants to tell the jury exactly what happened, and that's what's going to happen."

First, WTF?!? Am I taking crazy pills? Is this Law and Order SUV? Was Simeon Accused of DUI, man slaughter and goat rape? No. It's a silly misdemeanor. It's a glorified moving violation.

Also, let me see if I can dig up a few photos of Tuscaloosa's "jury of his peers"...


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Jury Selection: "Do you renounce Mike Shula? Do you believe in the one and true Coach, Nick Saban? What's your position on grown men sporting replica jerseys? If you spent your money on fine jewelry instead of Dorals would you shop at Brombergs?"


- This Dan Wetzel guy at Yahoo Sports has a batshit crazy idea. He's designed his plan for what he calls "A Division I College football Playoff." Yes, in the yearly, seemingly futile attempt to manipulate the power structure of college football, Wetzel has come up with another great solution/plan (seriously). Here is what it would look like in 2007 (big snoozer, right?):

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Click to enlarge

And for those of you who say "the bowl system is all about big money and that's why it won't be changed," I say once again, "What?" Do you honestly think this new system would be a big charitable event? The Division I college football playoff would immediately become the biggest, most passionate, most exciting, most well attended event in sports. And you Dick-breathed Bandits don't think it make you more money?

- LSUFreek (the Godfather of college football cheeky shenanigans) has breached the enemy lines at SmashMouthSports (Tennessee) and is dropping some major comedic smart bombs. He's freaking the Volunteer Fans with his redonkulous farking skills...And the Vol Farksters are not going down without a fight. The result is a Fark-off of galactically nerdy proportions, but I'm love every post. Currently 11 pages of photoshopped goodness. [HT: HeyBC]

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Simple, yet awesomely effective


- The problem with Michigan Football: Apparently Lloyd Carr was only working 40 hours a week. BTW, Ed Orgeron would triple that work load for half the money!!! (Anyone?...Bueller?)


- SI's Austin Murphy, of Murphy's Law, puts out a very entertaining peice (very "un-mainstream media" of him) involving many of our dearly departed who were involved in the dreaded Thanksgiving Coaching Massace of 2007. Houston Nutt and Ed Orgeron being the central characters of course.

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So, What you been up to, Ed? (um, reality show...you're welcome)

4 comments:

  1. Nice site you got here!
    Be sure to check out my blog about college scholarships

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  2. I'd like to know how/why pro-bono work isn't against NCAA rules.

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  3. I don't know if it's really pro-bono. They're probably charging him $1 a day or put the payment on layaway until he gets to the pros. Maybe the Big Oak Ranch is paying for it, who knows. The lawyas are from Gadsden.

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  4. I figured most of those were pro-bono. I think Juwan, or whatever his name is, was pro-bono. He had a really high profile lawyer for his case. Either way, that's not much different than handing someone keys to a new car as a "loan".

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